Do women need different support to men?

It’s amazing how a simple question can get so many people fired up. I asked this recently and it sparked a big debate. Some ladies were offended at the mere idea of requiring anything 'different' to what men do. But many felt women business owners do need a different kind of approach when it comes to business support – and I agree but keep in mind everyone is still diffrent.

Women need to share. Whether it’s the fact they don't know where to turn next, they have had a row with the kids or they can't figure out a piece of software – they prefer to ask for help and receive support.

They suffer from what I call 'mind monkeys' – those little voices in their head that tell them: "You're not good enough, you’ll never make any money, you'll never make a go of this business, what are people going to think of you...oh and by the way, you're a bad mum."

Do we men get these? If we guys do have mind monkeys then I’m sure we'd just brush them aside and get on with it. Girls, on the other hand, let it rule their life. Literally. Many women business owners have let their business fail, or have limited their business growth because of some old belief that’s hanging around in their head. Maybe their parents once told them that they weren’t good with money.  And for some reason that belief has stuck with them.  Can you imagine that stopping a male business owner? In my experience men are much better at saying 'stuff them!' and setting out to prove the doubters wrong. Women are much more likely to believe them.

They also have 'helpful' friends and family to contend with. Almost every day I hear from ladies who are doing their best to build a business – sometimes it’s just to make extra money for holidays, many others need to bring in a substantial income to pay the mortgage – and it's tough. In fact some days it's bloody hard to keep going. And it's usually on these days that a member of the family or a caring friend says something like: "Why don't you just give it up, it’s not working" or "When are you going to get a proper job." It's meant to be helpful but it’s like the kiss of death when you’re having a bad day.

What they need to hear is: "Keep going - you're doing great. All your hard work is going to pay off really soon, but it can take six months for your marketing to start bearing fruit" – because it's true. Too many women business owners are written off before they have a chance to prove themselves.  And they also don’t realise that they are listening to advice from people who don’t own their own business.  That's like asking a vegetarian what's the best way to cook a steak.

Women business owners often have to juggle home life and childcare with running a business. There are logistical implications such as only being able to work school hours if your children are small, and being restricted during school holidays. Also, if the school calls it's usually mum who has to drop everything because "her business isn't as important "as dad’s job. Now this is a sweeping generalisation but these are the things I see and hear every day.

Also women sell and buy differently to men do. So if they are following the 'old boys club' style of selling it isn't going to work.  Why? They are women. Women use completely different approaches to attracting clients, retaining and growing their customer base.  Cold-calling and aggressive sales techniques do not fit with most women entrepreneurs as well as their women clients.  So do they require different support in this very important area? Absolutely.

I really enjoy working with women business owners because they are so willing to share their successes and mistakes so that others can learn from them. They're willing to ask questions and step out of their comfort zone, with a little encouragement. And the results and rewards are truly inspiring. Some women I work with have changed dramatically over the space of a few weeks – all it took was some guidance on their business and marketing and a bucket load of peer support. Sharing where they are stuck is enough to bring forth a barrage of suggestions and ideas. Just having someone believe in you can be enough to make a difference.

I’m not saying we men don’t need these things too – it seems to me we are just not as ready to share or ask for help as women are.

With numbers of female-owned businesses dramatically on the rise, it’s more important than ever to make sure they have the support networks in place to look after these ladies who are contributing to our economy. The days of generic one-size-fits-all advice from government support agencies are over. Better, surely, to play to our strengths and help build our businesses in a way that works for them – and as women that means business advice tailored for female entrepreneurs, combined with peer support.

So do women need different support to men? Yes, I think they do, and that's OK. It's not sexist, 

demeaning or any other label you might be tempted to pin to it; it's just a fact, from a business owner who works with women business owners every day.  And if you're a female entrepreneur reading this, my advice to you is to ignore mind monkeys, 'helpful' friends and relatives, and the fact you might only have a few hours a week to spend on a business – take a calculated risk and go for it.

I can be also totaly wrong but look forwards to a debat here in linkedin on this. Have a great day all.